Kitchen Circles

                                                                     

Circa April 2010

Circa April 2012


These two photos were taken from the exact same spot in our house, but different angles.  I am kneeling down in front of our sink, camera in hand.  Both times the photo session became a little more than this wiggly girl could handle so both times she began running circles around me, and both times it produced better smiling pictures than the posed ones.

Taken almost exactly two years apart these pictures remind me, man this little Girl of mine is growing up!

The Story of Audrey

I love birth stories. 

Each one is SO different.  Every entry into this world is so unique and I have never heard two that are exactly the same.  Much like each child is different, the different ways they are brought into this world amazes me.

I love talking to other woman about birthing stories.  Some woman give you every detail from start to finish while others give you a round about way from beginning to birth.  Giving birth is such a personal thing, yet it's so common and refreshing to share your stories with other woman who have gone through a similar experience.

I have wanted to write down my own birth experiences but continue to put it aside as something I will "get to someday".  Now as I am days (hopefully!) away from my Third birthing experience I figure I should jot down some notes about the other previous Two, before they start to blur together :)

I am adding a lot of details, for my own sake.  But the highlighted bold text is the simpler, shorter version.

Tomorrow I will work on Ellie Lu's birth story, but for today, my precious First Born.

So with no further adieu...

The story of Audrey Lynn:

Due Date:  December 20th

Birth Date:  December 8th....12 days early!

Contractions began around 12pm on December 7th.  They were 45-30minutes apart & I wasn't sure it was true labor, so went about my day.  Re-packed my hospital bag (just in case), and headed for the library (we didn't have Internet at the time) to complete my speeding ticket class online :) Came home and got ready for work at 3pm, like usual.  Contractions slightly increased through the night but I still didn't think much of it because it was a busy night in the ER so I was well distracted, and I also had never been in labor before...so this "cramping" I kept feeling wasn't immediately thought to be labor, in my mind. 

I got off work at 11:30 and headed home for bed. 

(At this point contractions were about 20min apart, but manageable) 

I actually fell asleep.

(could never do that now knowing I was in labor!!)

I woke up at 2am in pain!  Yikes...this WAS labor!!  Contractions were about 15minutes apart.  I labored in bed, changing positions to be more comfortable as contractions came on.  Aaron woke up and I told him what was going on.  He went back to sleep  :)  (He had worked until 1am that night)

I tried dozing, but my mind was too excited/anxious/nervous.

I finally got out of bed when they were about 8-10minutes apart.

I walked into Baby Audrey's awaiting nursery room and realized the floor was covered with about 10 shopping bags full of unwrapped Christmas gifts to family and friends.  In a panic to not leave the house undone, I began wrapping Christmas presents at 4am, in between contractions! :)  Aaron came in and knocked some sense into me saying it didn't matter that nothing was wrapped, asked if we should go to hospital. 

I adamantly said "No!"  There are still things to be done!!  Christmas gifts, laundry, and dishes! Oh dishes!

I headed for the kitchen and began unloading the dishwasher, which seemed very important at the time.

At this point contractions had increased to 6 minutes apart and were getting pretty painful.  I could not talk, and had to completely stop what I was doing to lean over, gripping counter and get through each one. Aaron called the hospital to let them know.  They told him to bring me in, so he went out to warm up the car.  But I remembered all the books saying you are supposed to wait until contractions are 3-4 minutes apart until you go in......so I continued to try and unload the dishwasher.  Which took forever since I kept stopping in pain :)

Okay, 6am and contractions are 4-5 minutes apart...Lets Go!

We got to the hospital and Aaron prayed over me, our baby and the delivery which was about to take place before we walked in.

After all the initial assessments & monitoring it was determined, yes I am in labor.

We were put into a room.  I contracted for awhile in a lot of pain not knowing hot to get comfortable in bed then they suggested I try to relax in the hot tub.  I was about to be helped out of bed when I said, wait! One more! (meaning I was going to wait until this current contraction ended before getting up), so they all waited and as the contraction climaxed all of a sudden I felt a pop inside my tummy and the contraction immediately ended.  My water had broken!  Although I'm pretty sure I said... "I think I just...I think I just wet myself!"  :)

Water broke at around 9:30am.

I got into the hot tub right after and it was soothing for about 3 minutes.

Then I could not handle the pain.  I was mentally unprepared for what was happening to my body.  No books, birthing classes, or other mother's stories could have prepared me for those contractions.  I remember right after my water had broken a nurse leaned in and said quietly, "Okay, the contractions are going to start to get more intense now that your water broke."  AND THEY DID.

The only comfort I had was crying through each contraction.  I would try to take deep breaths as they began then just sob until the pain let off.  I will be honest and admit,

I could not handle it.

A nurse came in to check on me and my poor husband who didn't have a clue how to help his helpless wife who would say things like "Try to rub my shoulders...here comes another one...okay stop touching me (cry..cry..cry)"

The nurse informed us that if I wanted any pain relief that it may take up to an hour to get it, since the anesthesiologists have to be called in from home. 

Two contractions later I told Aaron, okay go tell her to call them in!

Thankfully, the anethesiologist was already in the hospital for surgeries that day.  They got me out of the hot tub and into the bed to wait, and within about 15 minutes of asking came the anesthesiologist who said "We always take care of our own!"  (Meaning he was coming to help me--a fellow hospital employee--first before he went into the surgery) Thank God!  He explained what he was about to do in between my contractions and tears and everything he said I would feel happened precisely when he said it would.  For having a giant needle shoved into your back while having excruciating abdominal pain, it really was a very calming experience being explained everything so well by him!  And just like he said...one strong contraction came...then a milder one...then one I could barely feel....then nothing.  HALLELUIA!  :)

I had my epidural at around 10:30am.

It is indescribable relief.  God bless an epidural.  I applaud woman who don't ever use one this day in age when it is an option for most births, I think that is remarkable.  I feel confident with my decision to have gotten one, and I see nothing "weak" about it, especially after feeling contractions for all the previous hours that lead up to relief.  And...my husband was happier I had one :)

We called our parents and told them what was going on and Aaron's parents were busy and didn't get the message until later but my Mom & Dad immediately came to hospital.  We got to visit a little bit, everyone was excited.  My Dr. came in to check on me and said with my progress she didn't expect our baby to be born until that evening. 

My parents left on some errands.

They began monitoring me and baby and with each contraction our baby's heart rate was decreasing. 

I was too busy enjoying "laboring" with out any pain, sipping broth and eating jello...no big deal..

But Aaron was worried about his baby girl, and kept a close eye on the monitors behind me.

They concluded that the cord must be around her neck in the womb, which was squeezing her tiny neck with each contraction.  Of course I cared, but I was in too much of a happy state that all of this was really happening and that we'd be meeting our baby soon!  Aaron remained calm but I could tell he was very concerned with the numbers which apparently continue to drop, drop drop...

1:45pm, I called my brother, Tom, living in DC to tell him about meeting our baby soon, but not until tonight.  My nurse came in to do another check to see how my progress was, so I said goodbye to my brother and got off the phone.

The nurse checked me and startled me with her reaction saying, "Okay, this baby is coming!"  She even so much as called the nursing desk from the room to tell them to get the Dr in here, she didn't leave since apparently...despite my ability to feel it, the progress had quickly escalated and it was time to push!

It was all quite sudden, especially having just told my brother--what we were told--that we wouldn't be meeting our baby until that evening.  So naturally, I cried.  :)  Stressful excitement!  It was go-time!  I really had to do this.

1:55pm, my Dr came into room and rushed around getting scrubs on as two nurses got what they needed and came to each side of me putting my feet up in stir-ups.  (Hello Ginny!)

I began pushing.  They would look at the monitor and tell me when to push.  Then my Dr. said the head was there, so I got to feel it and (my husband hates this part), they asked if I wanted to use a mirror to watch.  I looked up at Aaron for approval since he'd be looking at it too (which was VERY considerate of me--don't ya think?!).  They got the mirror and I tell ya what, that was the best decision ever.  Now bare with me, I know this is graphic....but. Having an epidural I was told when to push and couldn't tell if I was making any progress.  With the mirror, since I couldn't feel it, I could SEE my progress, which I truly believed helped me push harder. 

20 minutes of pushing later....

Audrey Lynn was born at 2:17 in the afternoon of December 8th, 2007

She was 6lbs, 8oz.  18 1/2 inches long.

She was born very blue with a faint little cry, until they quickly unwrapped the cord that was around her neck several times and once around her shoulder/arm.  Poor little baby!!

Then, much to her Mommy's, and especially her Daddy's relief, she let out a big hearty cry and pinked up.

She was perfect.  Beautiful, healthy, tiny.

Our little firstborn was everything I dreamed of.

A few more stats:

26 hours of labor from first contraction until Birth.

8 hours of what they consider "hard" labor, strong contractions close together.

20 minutes of pushing.

Epidural for 4 hours.

Could not pee on my own after birth...had to have a straight cath which I filled to the brim! :)

First visitors:   Both sets of NEW First Time Grandparents! Gerry & Luanne and Tom & Julie!

Audrey Painting her Own Nails for First Time

Pickle Juice

 

 I love that with out even planning on it, we both made almost the exact type of faces in each picture.
HAHA!

This little one & I have our own secret language it may seem. 
I give her a look she knows what it means. 
We tell eachother secrets, hers usually are observations about body parts.
I tell her a secret, and it usually has to do with putting pickle juice on her toes while she's sleeping.
She cracks up every time like it's the very first time she's heard me say that.
Like I said, it's a secret funny little language she & I share.

The other night I was giving her a quick one-two check, wiping her little sweet cheeks.  Her head was between my legs and as I'm wiping she says out of no where:

"Thank you Mom, You are a really nice Mommy"

Humbled. Joy. Flattered. Thankful. In Love. Blessed.

Even my best moments can come in the form of wiping a tush.

These are the things we as Mothers think go un-noticed.

Unappreciated.

Thank you Audrey, for noticing.

Valentines in October

"Daddy's Heart"

.....is wrapped up in all things Audrey lately.  And she to him, obviously.  :)

**For the record, she cut out that heart herself!  And she has been interested in spelling lately.  She likes to sound out words herself.  This has got to be my favorite of hers.  Ugh.. beyond precious.

Picture Retake & Little Catholic Girl

 What a little goofball this one is.

The night before she was to have her first ever "school pictures" I asked her if we could have a practice round. These are the result when asked for her to give me her very best smile...

 

 "Mom, take a picture of me like when I'm saying 'hello' to my friends"

Fortunately... School pictures were going to be outside and were cancelled due to the rain.

Luckily, we have more time to practice.

School update:  Audrey LOVES it! 

In fact, almost each day either before or after or even on days off she will say

"I just love school!"

It is darling, and something we would much prefer to hear.

Her teachers are such sweet gracious kind ladies, and I can tell each day that Audrey feels safe and cared for by them.

We chose this school initially for two reasons.

1.  It is only 5 houses away from us, making it an easy walk now and when Baby comes.

2. A few neighbor friends have sent their children there and have nothing but good to say about it.

After exchanging a few lengthy emails back and forth with the Teacher, I visited the school once by myself as an "observer" watching a typical school day.  We then exchanged more lengthy emails calming all my fears, anxieties and just random questions that had to do with sending my first born to her very first school.  Audrey & I visited once or twice on non-school days just to get a feel for the school room and teacher.  And we brought our whole little family over to meet with both of the teachers this summer to ask more questions and again see how comfortable Audrey was.  That may seem silly, afterall she is only 3, but this was an important decision for us.  Just because it was close was not going to be reason enough to send her into the unknowns of being away from Mommy!  So, we did our research!!!!!  :)

Aaron & I have talked about homeschooling, and we are not opposed to the idea for the future, nor are we by any means opposed to it now just because we have decided to send Audrey somewhere for 3 hours, 3 days away from me.  We look at ithis year as simply another "tool" in her learning.  Another social outlet, another adult outside of the home to learn from, listen to and respect, and basically a more structured/organized play group then I feel like I could offer right now.  I don't feel like I have stopped teaching my own child by any means.  She just now has another outlet for her learning.   

The Montessori Method of teaching is basically a practice of encouraging the strengths of the child through independent learning.  It is structured and organized, but the children have freedoms to choose the activities they wish to do, always remembering to put things away before beginning a new project. (!!!) A lot of the projects are skills to build upon a future skill.  I.e. Using only one hand to grasp small objects and organize them according to size.  This builds finger muscle and "pincer" grasp motion for writing.  Some of their other "work" includes counting games, or stacking blocks according to size or using scissors to cut out shapes or pins to poke out shapes...etc  They have an "asking stool" in which the children can go sit and wait if they have any questions or need assistance.  Another thing I love is that they do practical learning like sweeping, slicing food, collecting dirty hand towels for the laundry, serving themselves snack, cleaning up after themselves (!!!)..etc.

They also incorporate a Catholic curriculum.  Aaron & I weren't opposed to Audrey learning about Catholicisms, but we weren't exactly sure what that would mean at such a young age.  We knew there would be a bit of integrity and of course traditions, which we were okay with. 

As of late, we have both been impressed with the skills she has learned from her school.  She was already doing some of these things, but now insists on showing us she really can do these little helper things around the house like:

She insists on slicing her own fruit carefully, buttering her own bread and also pouring her own juice or milk.  (She is also eager to help clean up spills) She helps me to fold hand towels and place them in the correct drawer.  She always puts her playdoh away when she is finished with it. And as far as the Catholicism teaching goes?

So far, she has greeted us with "Peace Be With You" In which we are instructed to repeat back

"And Also With You".

She sings us a beautiful greeting they sing each morning, complete with hand motions:

"Good morning Dear God, I offer to you,

my thoughts

words

and actions

And all that I do!"

She has almost remembered all the words to a Latin hymn they sing.  She is also proud to show us the latin version of "Father Son & Holy Ghost" marking the traditional crossing of her chest.

But the other day took the cake for the funniest thing she has said yet.

I was in the kitchen tidying up and she had ran to the bathroom.

All of a sudden Audrey called out:

"Hail Mary, Full of Grace!"

I don't know if she was having some trouble in there or what, but it uh, ahem, apparently helped to call upon the Big Mama!  ;-)

**This pregnancy has been accompanied by it's fair share of constipation, I may just have to use that little Hail Mary trick...

Pre School, Changes & Ellie's Heart

Audrey's first week of Pre-school began a few weeks ago.

It was also....

Ellie's first week of transitioning from not having a playmate.

First week with our "new" truck.

Daddy's first week of being "home" for the summer.

Mommy's first week to try to adjust to all these changes....

Audrey was super excited even getting dressed in her "school" outfit she had chosen earlier in the day, shoes & backpack and all & waited by the door at around 7pm the night before her first day of school.... I finally got through to her that this would just be a practice and that tomorrow would be her first day of school. Eager as ever, she got ready first thing the next morning and waited by the door for the 30minutes leading up to when we were to leave... :)

Time to say goodbye to sister!

(who truly had no idea what was coming--look how happy she is to hug & say goodbye to Audrey...)

Her Daddy chose to come home one day early from a special road trip, so that he could take his darling little Audrey to school on her first day. And also, in part, because we both weren't quite sure how she--and her Mommy!--would do, emotionally on this big step being "away". (Literally, 5 houses away...)

She was so excited to start school that she apparently had to be told to turn around to say goodbye & wave for pictures her Momma requested. :)

First day of Pre-school! What a big brave girl!!

And then there were the other two of us.

Ellie & Mommy.

Crying our little eyes out on the front porch.

Not really....having Ellie sobbing her little heart out was probably a distraction from any emotion I could have had. Truly though..Ellie Lu was heartbroken!

It was one of those sad & sweet moments of motherhood.

I tried comforting...she cried harder.

I tried distracting...she cried harder.

I tried offering a snack (this girl likes food)..she ate it but continued to cry.

Then I suddenly realized...this would be the first day all Summer that I only had one child with me. Which meant I could do something I've been longing to do since last Summer! I could take my ONE child on my bike seat with me!!

So away we went, just she & I.

My baby Girl.

She finally stopped crying as we rode away, we talked about what we saw, what we heard and I kept telling her how much I Love her.

She seemed to enjoy the ride and I LOVED IT!

Then we got back to the house just in time for a little snack.

Then I noticed the time & said it was time to go get Audrey.

Ellie RAN to get her shoes & started getting whiny & crying again.

She just could not handle the change! She loves her sister so much!

On our walk back home, Audrey saw that her Daddy had begun the walk to meet us.

She started yelling to him:

"Daddy! Daddy! I'm all done with school now!"

And ran, jumping into his eager waiting arms.

PRECIOUS!

Can you bottle this sweetness up??

Then we decided to take Audrey out to celebrate her first day of school in style.

With Frozen Yogurt!

My Dad & Brother Mike just opened up a yogurt shop nearby--FroYo Nation--a few days prior, so what a perfect opportunity for us to see it for the first time & as a special celebration for Audrey!

Grandma Lu met us down there, of course!

A spoonful of sweetness, makes the tears go away!?

Daddarazzi.

Two big girls, one little spoon.

Wait a minute.

And here's what we were riding in style in!

Our "new" purdy Blue, 2nd vehicle with carseats stick shift which I am actually enjoying learning how to drive, Truck!!!

As of Today Audrey has attended 9 days of school! The first 3 weeks were "transitional" days, so they were only one or two hours.

Today was her first day of all 3 hours. She seemed tired, but said she "just loves school!"

I really could not have seen it coming that she has so easily adjusted to this new change! She was truly ready for this! We knew she would like it eventually, but by day 3 when I took her and asked her to please come back to give me a hug before she ran off into the schoolroom...I knew that she really did love it, and that I'd be fine too. :)

Ellie.... has yet to have a tear-free day with out her sister. The first few days were rough :) I spent the majority of the time Audrey was away from us, comforting her sad little sister, Ellie. We watched Sesame Street & cuddled, we ate snacks, we did puzzles and built blocks, but there were stressful off & on tears. We visited a dear friend who just had a baby, we take walks around the neighborhood and we've spent a few of the days running errands. I can tell though, that we aren't in a good groove quite yet. Ellie is so emotional on Audrey's school days. My intention is that Ellie & I can have a sort of fun Mommy/Ellie time at home, maybe even doing our own school-at-home projects. Potty training was also on the to-do list this fall, but there seems to be too much going on to begin something big like that just yet. Maybe in another few weeks...

Audrey Lynn--your Daddy & I are so proud of you! On your very first day of school your two teachers told me you had "mastered it all & wanted to begin teaching the other children!" I was not surprised to hear that! :) And every day thereafter they have made similar comments about how well you are doing. You are like a little sponge, soaking all of the Goodness of the world in. And your Kindness to others is evident. I love that you love school! I pray for you every day you are away from me. Just know that we are proud of who God created--Beautiful You!!

Love, Your Momma who misses you.

Ellie Lu--We'll get there soon. I promise. We'll enjoy the time we have together before another big change comes and alters it for us. I plan to get to know you better and snuggle you up lots during this season. So please let me. My heart breaks when yours does, but we will be fine. Thank you for loving your sister so deeply! You are a Gift!

Love, Your Momma.

...Jesus Loves Me...

Jesus Loves Me, this I know

For the Bible tells me so,

Little Ones to Him belong,

They are weak but He is strong...

Yes Jesus Loves Me

Yes Jesus Loves Me

Yes Jesus Loves Me

The Bible tells me so...

This song is imprinted on my heart.

It's been a favorite song of mine since I was a child.

It's a simple but personable lesson & reminder of God's Grace upon me, Ginny.

From the time Audrey was fresh out of my safe warm womb I have sang her this lullaby. It's my song just for her. She has been completely calmed by these lyrics in a number of sad hysterical circumstances.

I have fallen asleep singing this on repeat while nursing or rocking baby Audrey.

I highly recommend adopting one song in particular for your child, it is a sort of go-to place where we escape together to anytime, anywhere.

For Ellie, it's been a different song.

Last night was a rough time getting Audrey to fall asleep. Normally she does fine, with the occasional request of an animal she forgot to take with her to bed, or one last potty trip. But every once in awhile she just has some trouble. Of course last nights "trouble" was due to having a few busy days in a row and two days worth of skipping naps...

Eventually I found myself leaning into her bed trying to calm her down and after talking softly for a bit I went right into "Jesus Loves Me".

Her eyes were blinking slower & I thought great! She'd be asleep in no time!

And then...

"Mom, whats 'weak-butt'?"
I tried to explain, but couldn't help but laugh. :)

And for the next few minutes she repeated:

"weak-butt! (giggle giggle)...weak-butt! (giggle giggle)..."

I tried to finish the song but it was no use that time :)

So I laughed and fake-laughed all the way out the door...

I'll be more careful to pause in between particular words next time, but it's still a beautifully simple song with a world of meaning.

Jesus Loves Me, this I know

For the Bible tells me so,

Little Ones to Him belong,

They are weak but He is strong...

Yes Jesus Loves You

Yes Jesus Loves You

Yes Jesus Loves Me

The Bible tells me so...

....And so does the Holy Spirit tell me through nature, my sisters-in-Christ, my Christian & non-Christian friends/family alike, online readings, my neighbors, the world, people I meet, through His plan for my life, through my wonderful loving husband, and the fact that I have been entrusted with two amazing gifts wrapped up in the form of 23 perfectly beautiful pounds & 28 perfectly gorgeous pounds....

And this I know: I know that

I Love Jesus

&

JESUS LOVES ME!

Audrey's 3rd Bday

Since we're talking December... a very special little lady had a birthday.

Not just any birthday, her Third birthday.

First, a beautiful lavendar Tu-Tu handmade by her Aunt Lillian was joyfully worn all night.

We have small space and don't necessarily like the idea of a lot of people and a lot of gifts, so we kept it very small this year. Although, you wouldn't have known it by the fullness of our home! It was a fun evening with all the people closest to Audrey that took time away from what they were doing to show value on Audrey's little growing life.

We had enchiladas, special presents and a checkerboard chocolate/vanilla cake.

While everyone chatted I noticed little Missy was missing..

Where is the birthday girl anyway? Oh... there you are!

Sneaking a peak at your birthday cake! :)

"Ah! Mom it looks just like my favorite Movie! Toy Story 3 and I am three!"

She loved it. :)

Mmmmm

Eating Dinner--Full table!



Grandma Julie showing Audrey her next gift! A beautiful big girl bedspread!

New rule for next year: If YOU bring the gift, YOU put it together! :) None of this making the Dad do it, or last year was worse...Audreys Grandma Lu & her Great Grandma Warren put together a gift not given from either of them! New rule is officially in effect.

Life size Elmo!

(checkerboard cake inside)

Audrey with her two loving Grandmas

Saying goodbye to being Two years old...

Three.Years.Old

She turned 3 and never looked back...

(and for the record, she's been giving me a run for my money ever since!!)