4 Kisses

Dear Ellie Lu Bear,

Do you mind that I can't stop staring at you lately? I have your face well memorized by now. Not in the--finally after 19 months I can recognize your face in a crowd--memorize. But a--I know I can make you give me a certain look if I do this or that--memorize. A kind of familiarity that assures me you are mine and I am yours. Every speck of color in your eye I have memorized (green, blue, brown). Your nose shape. Your hairline. Your soft pink cheeks. Every bit of you is beautiful to me. I know you will only allow a certain number of kisses before I get pushed away. I'm okay with that number now.

I know all Mom's probably go in & out of trying to make up one-on-one time with their 2nd born. I am no exception. A few weeks ago it was Crystal Light. I would sneak a little bit into your water sippy cup, give you a wink which was met with your smile. Your smart big sister figured it out at some point and the trick was over.

The other day while your Sister was sleeping, I brought you into the shower with me. While my other girlie would have lasted a whole 3 minutes before she'd cry and cry and beg to get out due to water in the eyes, you loved it. We played, we cleaned. We hugged. Maybe that could be our "thing" now, until we are discovered. Shower Hour. Bring your sweet cheeks and smiley wet face :)

I Love you Ellie. You are becoming so much of what I didn't know I needed my whole life.

You are you and a Beautiful You, you are.